I have now been out of Albania longer than I lived in Albania. It seems so crazy to think about. Most days it feels like I just got back. Like I’m still trying to find my place in the culture here, still trying to figure out the balance of who I have become after living in Albania and who I should be in the States.
What no one tells you is that this is a never ending process. They may warn you that you won’t fit in – that you’ll never be the same. But what they don’t tell you is that it becomes harder to talk about and harder to live with. Because while the life you built overseas is still so fresh in your memory 2 years later, it has become that thing you did that one time to everyone else.
After 2 years, people no longer want to hear about how you are struggling – struggling to settle into the States, struggling to find your place in the culture, struggling to let go of the thing you did that one time because you are trying your hardest to hold on to every little thing you can find that resembles the life and people you miss so that you wont lose that part of you, of who you’ve become.
But the thing is, it’s still very much a part of who l am today. Even though I’m very much removed, my Albanian family, friends and experiences are all still strongly shaping my character, my lifestyle and my choices today. That thing I did that one time might have been over 2 years ago but there has never been one day that has gone by where I don’t think about my experiences, miss that crazy, frustrating and rewarding way of life or miss my family and friends I had to say goodbye to. There has never been a day where Albania fails to enter my thoughts or influence my choices.
Even if I never talk about it anymore, Albania is still playing a major role in shaping who I am becoming – even though it’s just a thing I did that one time.
It’s kind of like school…you did that one thing one time…some time back…but it has major implications on who you are now and what you are determining to do. All of life experiences are discovered one at a time…some short time, some long-drawn out time…but impacting who you are and what you want to be. Don’t let others deter you from relishing in the richness of your experience. Never forget the friends you made, even if you never see them again. They are part of you, too! God bless, Katie!
You and Nicole were missed at conference in Germany this week! We actually just talked about you all with Corey and Emily today in the airport as we were all waiting for our flights back home!! -Sarah